The Sacrificial First Entry

Hello reader. See that date up there? That's when this was written, the very first post on my soon to be very filled blog. Either it hasn't been very long since this website was started or for whatever reason you were compelled to journey through the archives all the way to the beginning, to see how it all began. Unfortunately for you, all you're going to get is a paragraph with some words that basically confirms that the past ten seconds of your life happened.

((By the way, can you spot Jesus in the ultrasound?))

So this is it, the great beginning from whence all great stories and blogs must eventually come.  Perhaps as you are reading this the blog has already become famous, gracing the cover of WIRED for being the greatest blog ever penned (typed?).  Unlikely.  More likely than not, I've known you for some time, it's about three in the morning wherever you are, and you're just too tired to look at porn like a normal person.  Well shame on you.  As my older sister would say, there are flaccid children in Africa, so go jerk off!  Actually, she would never say that at all.  That's a really disturbing command when it isn't a cabbie screaming it.  I digress.

I feel as though it would be necessary to raise a toast, so here goes: 

"To Google, to Blogger, tried and true.

To YouTube, and iTunes, and TiVo, too.

The information age is here at last,

but this person's stuck reading blogs from the past."